I’ve been chosen to make safety videos for Airsoft Colorado. I’m very happy about this, but I was instructed to make all 10 videos this past week, and I’ve only gotten one done. I have to admit, making videos isn’t easy, especially if you’re a perfectionist. Today, I had to go over a script several times along with many sound checks because I thought the microphone was broken. I was walking back and forth from the video studio to my boss’s office (who was out of town, so I was using his mac to edit the videos) pretty frequently. I didn’t think I was bothering Matt or JD (the only two people who were there), but clearly, I was wrong.

Near the end of the day, when I was finally able to start the video, I heard Matt talking to Frank (who had come in a few hours earlier). Although I was two rooms away and all I could hear was a few words, it was enough to piece together sentences. Sentences that spoke ill of me.

“Ozias hasn’t done sh*t today, all he is doing is walking back and forth from the studio to the office, what a lazy ass.”

I didn’t hear Frank’s response, probably because he just laughed him off about it. I’d imagine he’d do that, because we’re friends (or… I think we are). After hearing that, I couldn’t continue the video I was working on because my personal feelings shone strongly through my face. I couldn’t go on, I was way to stressed.

I went up to the rafters of the studio, an attic-like section where strange, random items are put like rugs and old computer monitors. I sat there and did a lot of thinking. I tried to piece together the clues… and I came out with a lot.

At first, I was very confused; why would Matt say something so invidious? It’s the most painful thing to know he was speaking behind my back when all I’ve ever done was be nice to him. To tell you the truth, I’ve never even liked him that much, and I’m still very kind to him. The reason for my animosity was because he is always standoffish towards me. I try to have a conversation with him, but he always ends it quickly and runs off. This bewildered me because sometimes he was very friendly with me.

Then I figured it out, he’s just a fake. The only recorded moments in my data show that he’s only nice to me when he wants something in return. Every other situation is in front of my boss, and he doesn’t want to look bad now, does he?

Whenever I’ve talked bad about somebody at work, it’s at home, to my mom, who doesn’t listen to me, or doesn’t even know what I’m talking about. I’m disturbed how somebody would talk bad about their co-workers at work, with other co-workers! Ha, look at me make a big deal about this when there’s no doubt that this happens all the time.

But all of this makes me happy for several things. The first one is being glad I turned down the invitation to the company Christmas party of 4 people (well, make that 3 now). After running through several simulations, I determined that it was something I wouldn’t of liked to partake in. Thank goodness, too! Now I really don’t want to go! Casey made a point that he wanted to make a company that “made happiness within the workplace.” Well, so much for that, Casey can talk all he wants, but he’s never around to do quality checks or to ensure everybody is doing well. That being said, the second reason I’m happy is because next week is my last week at work. I don’t want to see anybody I work with again, I just want to get this last week over with. Matt, Frank, and Casey can all go on their Christmas party together and do whatever. Casey can continue to think that Matt is this happy-go-lucky guy and continue to leave him in charge of the office. But whatever happens happens, I’ll be long-gone by then, and I’ll be incredibly lucky, too. It sounds like the next person they’re going to hire is the type of person that gets on my nerves.

Actually, now that I think about it, Casey seems to hire only a specific type of personality, I was the odd one out from the very beginning… Casey is aware of my talent and motivation, he has told me these things. I’ve been able to see the real side of many of the people at work, and they don’t match up with Casey’s personality type, I’m the closest one. I was reassured a little bit by this, Frank told me that Casey was upset recently since it will be my last days here next week.

I know Casey will miss me a lot, I firmly believe that I was unlike any employee he’s ever seen, but with so few employees and such a high demand, he has no choice but to hire whoever he gets. Being with Matt ever since he’s been hired, it’s clear that he’s just a selfish jerk that will do anything to get money. He’s motivated, but he’s motivated to the point where he will mow people down to get to the top, and that… bothers me. The worst part is that I genuinely believe he will make it to the top, and just the thought of all the people caught in his wake causes me a bit of anxiety. I pray he is stopped.

As for Frank, the only other employee who is staying after JD and I leave; I fear for him. Frank isn’t… very bright. Because of this, I can easily see Matt just using him as a stepping stone to domination. In several years, I just see him being in the same place he started… I wish him the best…

Just 5 days left of work, then I have other problems to deal with…

Yes! You can watch it in 3-D! But you can also turn it off if you like! Sorry about the end, it gets cut off.

Troy

My boss first took us out to lunch to Red Robin, on our first day of work, and we had a great lunch. This time around, it was… different. There seemed to be many moments of awkward silence, and nobody knew what to say, because we had all asked our get-to-know-each-other questions the first time around. The awkwardness flooded the air, as nobody knew what to say. The conversation only rose a little bit when my boss brought up movies, but it didn’t get far after that because none of us watch movies on a regular basis.

When we got back, my boss seemed a bit frustrated with me because I kept asking him questions every step of the way (we were learning something new). I’ve been afraid of asking stupid questions my whole life and when I got this job, I just wanted to ignore that fear and just ask, ask, ask. Well, I should of just kept to myself, my boss told me how I needed to start using my brain and making decisions on my own.

For $8.00/hr, you get a robot that can repeat simple tasks. If you want the model that make decisions on its own, that’s going to cost you extra. My boss is trying to squeeze me for every penny I’m worth, and I’m telling ya, I’m worth way more than 800 pennies an hour.

I was angered he had to put me down, so I stopped asking questions like he wanted, then an hour later, when he brought something up, I found out I was doing it wrong. Why? Because if I ask questions, I’m going to get lectured to start using my brain.

The thought that my boss can keep/fire me after 60 days (or was it 90?) frightens me. It feels like I’m on a reality T.V. show competing with myself. I probably could of easily gotten that other job as a chiropractic clerk for $10.00/hr, but I decided to stay where I was. I just hope it was worth it…

Next week, my boss is going to be away on a business trip. I’m guessing he’ll be assigning Caleb and I tasks while he’s away. I pray he doesn’t throw something new at us. I’d prefer to keep it simple.